the good out of the not so good

This post are my reflections over the past two days and our current situation and how the good is coming out of the not so good. I am breaking it down in two categories which I find helpful to think through this situation. If you don't know what situation I am talking about, please read the post below.

Simple: The simple fact of why we are not in South Asia right now is that we don't have visas. Period. We should have taken the time, asked all the questions, and prepared for this trip even better. But, we failed to do that and the effect of that is that we are not in South Asia right now. This is the answer to way we are not in South Asia. It would be easy to hyper-spiritualize this situation like someone would blame the Devil for their 1980s car breaking down every thousand or so miles. No, it is the car, period. In our situation, we could ask, "Why doesn't God want us over there right now?" and come up with tons of reasons none of them biblical or healthy. Another question could be, "We weren't prepare spiritually enough or we committed some kind of sin?" Again this is unbiblical and unhealthy. God through the Gospel simply does not function in this way. Yes, we are not prepared spiritually enough. This is a given, but God will supply all our needs at the time when we need them and grow us through our brokenness not our righteousness. Yes, we sin daily not loving Him as we ought. But, God doesn't deal with us this way as our sin is on Christ. The simple, boldface fact is we don't have visas. It wasn't a sin, it was an oversight on our part and now we have to deal with the circumstances.

Complex: Now, how we deal with the circumstances is where we grow in grace and the good can come out. Paul Tripp and Tim Lane, a pastors and biblical counselors, give us a great model to consider in all circumstances in their book, How People Change. The model, based out of Jeremiah 17, is when a circumstance comes we react with thorns (we sin, get frustrated, blame-shift, try to control, etc...). Then, by the Spirit, we are moved to the cross where forgiveness is found through repentance. Finally, we bear fruit from the circumstance and grow in grace.

One thing that I have been thinking of over the past month and all that has happened in the Stock Household is the purpose of suffering and walking through troubles. Why does God lead/guide/ordain/let troubles happen? Well there are many reasons and ultimately we don't fully know. But, the one that I have been thinking of is that when troubles come, life's questions press heavy on your mind. They are shaken loose from the depths of your heart, and rise to the surface of your thoughts. They are questions which do not come from the everyday, mundane life. In the past two days, these circumstances have allowed for good questions to rise to the top and for us to deal with them by grace for His glory.

So, here are some of the good which has come out of the not so good:

1) Mandy and I have been able to spend the past two days with each other. We were able to sleep in past 8:30, spend some quality time together at Starbucks, Lowes to look at flooring (yes, we have moved closer to being our parents!), watch a movie, went grocery shopping, gone on walks/run at the park, and went out on a date to Maggiano's.

2) During the date, we were able to have a great time to talk. Mandy had a great idea of finding some questions for married couples on the Internet. Some were fun while others were a little more serious. We each wrote down about seven questions and during the date we talked through them. It was great to listen to each other.

3) Repentance. I am so thankful for repentance which leads to life. Admitting that I am wrong is a grace I need to live daily. Forgiveness is sweet because love is the goal. During the date, Mandy and I were able to ask for each others forgiveness in many areas. Thankfully, our song is the cross of Christ where life-bringing forgiveness comes from. Also, we were able to ask for forgiveness for our thorny response of frustration and blame-shifting to our circumstance to each other and others.

4) Lydia. Lydia is having a ball at the grandparents. She is laughing and giggling all day. Apparently today, while getting pictures at Walmart, she drew a crowd during her photo shoot. The best thing is that she is spending time with the grandparents. Yes, one of the hardest things about living a missionary, is being away from family. So, all the time that she can hang out with family brings the blessing of her to them. Another great thing is that we get to be with her for her birthday (the 16th)!